To wit, an open letter to the ‘Red States’ of America:

Dear Red States:

If you manage to steal this election, too, we’ve decided we’re leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we’re taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren’t aware, that includes California, Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood.

We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom.

We get Harvard. You get Ole’ Miss.

We get 85% of America’s venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama.

We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22% lower than the Christian Coalition’s, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms.

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we’re going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they’re apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don’t care if you don’t show pictures of their children’s caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we’re not willing to spend our resources in Bush’s Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80% of the country’s fresh water, more than 90% of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of the nation’s fresh fruit, 95% of America’s quality wines, 90% of all cheese, 90% of the high tech industry, 95% of the corn and soybeans (thanks Iowa!), most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford, Cal Tech, UCLA, Berkeley and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88% of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92% of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100% of the tornadoes, 90% of the hurricanes, 99% of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100% of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38% of those in the Red States believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we’re discussing the war, the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a theory, 53% that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61% of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

Finally, we’re taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,
Blue States

My work is done here!

Photo ID: John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum

As I write this, it’s exactly 53 days to the American presidential election. Republican John McCain has been basking — some would say ‘wallowing’ — in the glow that is Sarah Palin. Democrat Barack Obama, meanwhile, has been huddling with his advisors trying to decide how best to counter the effect that having a female on the GOP ticket has had on Senator McCain’s popularity - he’s on top in almost every major tracking poll. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

About eight months ago some low-level political media darling who added ‘pundit’ to his resume suggested that “…a refrigerator could beat McCain this year…” But it was Howard Dean, head of the Democratic National Committee, former governor of Vermont and former presidential candidate in 2004 who said the following words on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart more than a year ago:

“The Republicans are the best campaigners. They know how to campaign - but they can’t govern. Democrats, on the other hand, know how to govern… but we have problems campaigning.”

Not a very soothing thought. Not a phrase that instills confidence in the left-leaning electorate.

Watching and listening to Senator Obama for the better part of nineteen months it’s tough to see how anyone could have launched, conducted and maintained a better-run campaign for the presidency. Even if you forget the fact that he’s black and that his relatively rapid ascendancy to challenge for the highest office in the land is both historic and awe-inspring, a comparison of his suggested policies and voting record opposite John McCain should leave no one in doubt as to who the better president would be. The last eight years alone should shave more than a few points off McCain’s chances with Vegas odds-makers.

And yet, here we are. Today’s Financial Times of London contains a banner headline, “Democrats On Capital Hill Fear Obama Fallout”. A wire story circulated to newspapers all across the United States last week stated that, privately, congressional democrats are ’suddenly’ concerned about Obama’s chances. Yesterday’s Gallup Poll on the congressional races was headlined, “Battle For Congress Suddenly Looks Competitive”. That refrigerator appears to be fully stocked. No, it wasn’t supposed to be this way.

It seems so easy to have it all slip away. The brass ring, within grasp, is snagged by an interloper. Defeat snatched from the jaws of victory. Perhaps a look back will help put some distance — literally — between the desire that was and the reality that is. Take that ’sure thing’ and knock it off its pedestal so we can all get a better look.

Photo ID: Associated Press

I’ve just finished reading Ted Sorensen’s autobiography, “Counselor”. Ted was President Kennedy’s head speech writer, confidante, advisor and friend. He was a policy wonk of the highest order when policy was everything. He wrote (or co-wrote) all of JFK’s speeches during his short presidency, and was on the front lines during all of Kennedy’s critical moments - the Cuban Missile Crisis chief among them. “Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country.” Sorensen wrote it. Kennedy said it. America heard it and responded.

A lot has been said and written about Obama’s similarity to Kennedy, some of it even by Obama himself. There’s no question that the idealism Kennedy represented in the early 1960s is shared by the senator from Illinois almost fifty years later - the comparisons and connections are striking. And perhaps — perhaps — Ted Sorensen deserves some of the credit.

Ted was and is a proud liberal Democrat. He’s been a supporter of Barack Obama from day one, and it’s been reported that he serves the campaign as an ‘unofficial’ advisor, sometimes writing sections of Obama’s speeches. During Obama’s Super Tuesday victory speech back in February — the now-famous ‘yes we can’ speech — Obama said the following:

“You see, the challenges we face will not be solved with one meeting in one night. Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. We are the hope of those boys who have little; who’ve been told that they cannot have what they dream; that they cannot be what they imagine. Yes they can.”

Is THAT pure Sorensen…?

One of the great aspects of Ted’s autobiography is the way in which he places campaigning, specifically presidential campaigning, into context. With the media reporting on every little mistake, misplay and gaffe the candidates make during this election cycle, I found it fascinating to read Sorensen’s ‘take’ on the subject. His insight is peppered throughout the book, but two of his viewpoints are specifically appropriate, and I wanted to quote them both. I think they help in putting this election, and the way in which it is being reported, into perspective.

“As hard as it is on the speechwriter and staff, a presidential campaign is even rougher on the candidate. It is impossible for him to remember the names of all the people whose hands he shakes, to remember the time of day, the day of the week, the town in which he is speaking; to remember his own previously stated positions on issues, much less those of his opponents. But if he sounds temporarily inconsistent, the press calls it weakness; if he is ambiguous, his opponent calls him a coward. Through it all, he must appear sincere and self-assured, smile through the rain and pain, protect his hand from being crushed and his suit from being torn, freeze in an open car, perspire in a stuffy banquet hall, smile at those who curse him, listen patiently to those who repeatedly advise the obvious, and repeat his own positions until he tires of his own words, restrain his natural candor, be cautious about his humor, and exude enthusiasm about the ordeal he is enduring and every person he meets. All day, the press is outside his door and window, the rooms are full of sweat and smoke, his hand is bruised, scratched, full of calluses…. Everyone you meet wants something from you, your time, your endorsement, your support for some local project or measure; and then you move on to three more stops in three more states before you fall into bed. It is an exercise best suited to fanatics, egomaniacs and superbly fit athletes.”

From: “Counselor” by Ted Sorensen - Chapter 15 - Senator Kennedy’s Quest For The Presidency - pp. 186-187

Later in the book he admits to having given advice to many presidential candidates and would-be candidates over the years. Considering the debate that still rages between the McCain and Obama camps (and in the media) over the ‘experience’ issue (or lack of it), I found this section especially appropriate.

“For those future presidential candidates among my readers who want my advice, the following is a condensed compilation of all the related memos I’ve written to would-be presidents who approached me for advice over the last several decades - including Ted Kennedy, George McGovern, Jimmy Carter, Gary Hart, Mario Cuomo, Bob Kerrey, John Kerry and Barack Obama.

[The embedded memo, only a small portion of which is quoted here, is entitled:

To: Presidential Hopeful
From: Theodore C. Sorensen
Subject: So You Want To Be President - Ed.]

“…am I smart enough to be president? I suggest you review that question in three contexts: First, compare your intelligence, judgment, courage and ability to lead with those of the others who have recently held, sought, or will be seeking the presidency. Neither Jefferson nor Lincoln is running this time. Experience is relative. No office provides meaningful preparation for the unique responsibilities of the presidency.”

From: “Counselor” by Ted Sorensen - Chapter 32 - My Continuing Involvement In Politics - pp. 480

No office provides meaningful preparation for the unique responsibilities of the presidency. One assumes he means mayor, governor OR senator.

I’ve never pretended to be ‘fair and balanced’ in my political views; I dress to the left, so to speak. Were I an American I would not only be voting for the Obama/Biden ticket, I’d be campaigning for it. My view of American politics has been shaped by decades of watching, listening, comparing and assessing American policies at home and abroad, mostly abroad. It’s why I believe that this election is the most important election of my lifetime - the most important election in the world, for the world. I say that because American foreign policy is one of its cornerstones, and it impacts not just Americans but everyone that policy touches regardless of country. The Republican administration of Bush/Cheney is the perfect example of how NOT to govern, and Senator Obama’s mantra of ‘change’, while simplistic, has hit fragile nerves from Bakersfield to Berlin. And yet, here we are.

I’m hoping that the addition of Governor Sarah Palin to the Republican ticket energizes the Democrats anew. That on the heels of that idealistic ‘first wave’ of ‘change’ — a mantra now co-opted by the McCain camp — there occurs a ’second wave’. One of firm opposition, surgical confrontation, adroit campaigning and unfettered, contagious optimism in the future with a Democratic administration lead by Barack Obama, Joe Biden and a laundry list of the best and brightest minds in America.

Clock’s ‘a tickin’!

Check out the bill and count the number of alcoholic drinks served. To wit… 2 Balvenie Scotch, 1 Pint Special, 1 Cream Ale Pint, and — wait for it — 32 bottles of Cuban Cristal Lager!

There was food, too, of course, but more than half the bill — $310 without tip! — was for alcohol. Crap!

Perhaps the reason I’d forgotten about this is because I’m still recovering from the hangover! “You have been served.” No shit!

Click the ‘Gadling’ link above to see their original post.

This was too funny not to post!

I’m a big fan of Bizarro cartoons in much the same way I was a big fan of Kliban and Gary Larson’s Far Side. Gary’s “Latte, Jed?” still stands as one of the hands-down funniest single cartoon frames of all time!

These guys belong in a select fraternity. As funny, topical, outrageous, contemporary, smart and at times controversial as any of the best stand-up comedians. Their work was and is droll, witty, inspired and frequently fall down hysterical - always arriving from ‘left field’.

This particular Bizarro cartoon falls distinctly into the political, not to say ‘accurate’ category. It hits both a nerve and a funny bone. Nice work if you can get it!

A mini rant here. Those of you who have wandered by this blog every once in a while to have a quick look-see, or even spend some quality time perusing the content, might recall that I incorporate some of my favourite links to other sites, just here on the right-hand sidebar. They include a couple of friends’ blogs and a handful of others that I find especially noteworthy.

Well, as of today one of those links has changed.

Gadling is (or rather, was) an excellent source of travel-based material: pointers, tidbits and recommendations from real-world travellers, just like me and many of the people I know. It was well-written, informative, frequently funny and often a source of solid travel data that simply couldn’t be found anywhere else, certainly not in this format.

Sadly, that began to deteriorate about six months ago. It has recently devolved into a poorly-written, badly-edited screed that looks and reads as if it were being managed by a twelve-year old bully with Bill O’Reilly syndrome (”WE’LL DO IT LIVE!”). It has become nothing more than a hobbled shadow of its former self. But there’s more (or less, depending on how you see it).

In the past few weeks there have been many posts to Gadling that were not only severely off-topic, but xenophobic and in at least two instances hurtful - all written by the same person (who shall remain nameless). I weighed-in on these posts and posted my comments along with a number of friends who agreed and did the same, plus many others from all over the world. The response from Gadling (parent: AOL) was not only to ban one of the commenters from the site (and possibly others), but to eradicate their comments as well. It’s as if they and their comments never existed - they were ‘disappeared’.

Just this morning Gadling sent an e-mail to this person suggesting that the ‘Comments’ section was not the place to comment on the content of a blog entry or the way in which it’s written. BULLSHIT! That’s why it’s called a ‘Comments’ section - it is the very reason for it. The point of the exercise was to be as public about the comments (and the outrage) as possible, not to have it lie in some weak editor’s virtual in-box.

And lest anyone think that this was the reaction of one, maybe two responders (myself included), one particular post that clearly struck a nerve garnered over 400 responses, dozens of which took this writer to task for the very same poorly considered and badly written content.

There’s a sadness at losing a great travel website to amateurish hacks. There’s precious little really good travel writing online or even through newspapers and periodicals these days, and Gadling was a breath of fresh air. Finding new and engaging material posted several times a day (often MANY times), was great - you never knew where the next ‘adventure’ was coming from. Yes, there are good writers submitting to Gadling, quite a few actually. But they seem few and far between when compared to the prolific output of the others. The only upside to this deterioration is that all those terrific articles that USED to populate the site are searchable in their database.

But this is more than just ‘loss.’ The one particular Gadling writer is not alone - there are others. The level of quality writing — never mind the horrid grammar, spelling and geographical errors — is quite astonishing when compared to what it was six months ago, even four. The meanspiritedness, and even outright callousness of some of the posts (like this one) often alternates between being jingoistic and misanthropic. The hackneyed editorial guidelines that allow these kinds of jaw-dropping and often off-topic posts to be submitted for vetting is one thing, but the editorial direction that allows them to be published is quite another. Add to that the squelching and censorship that parades as ‘reaction’ by those same editor(s) when people don’t agree with what’s been said, and you have a vile stew of a publishing venture that appears to operate on a “I-know-you-are-but-what-am-I…?” set of rules.

Gadling wasn’t and isn’t some basement-level grade school ‘current affairs’ project. It was and is a professional travel writing website with advertising and investors that generates revenue from the uniques, the bookmarks and the links of interested eyeballs - yours and mine. If website ventures — especially ones that are owned and operated by larger media companies — wish to be considered competitive in the grander scheme of things (and the so-called ‘blogosphere’ has certainly had a significant impact on the more traditional forms of media), then they have to be held to similar ideals and expectations. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.

People are fond of saying that the Internet is in its infancy - it is not. This September marks the tenth anniversary of the launch of Google as a search engine - an event that quite literally changed the way the Internet worked, certainly how we all used it. YouTube is barely three years old and I doubt anyone would debate the impact it has had on everything during that short period of time. It’s taken a while, but most of us have come to accept the fact that there is no such thing as the next ‘killer app’. The Internet IS the next killer app - always has been, always will be.

With the worldwide decrease in newspaper and magazine circulation; the catastrophic drop in television ratings; the consolidation of media outlets across all strands; and with the impact all of this continues to have on associated staff cuts, bureau closures and advertising revenues, good or bad, like it or not, the Internet increasingly has become the ’source’ the world turns to. This is the world in which Gadling, and all other websites of its ilk, operate.

Maybe some day soon the geniuses at Gadling will wake up and realize that the billowing smoke and burning stench is emanating from their own bridges.

End of rant.

(* Please note: The original upload of this post included a YouTube video of the Al Gore speech referenced here. However, that video link came with an ‘undocumented feature’ - a virus of some sort. It knocked out this post in its entirety at first, then, after a migration to new servers corrupted the entire blog. After some trial and error, and no small amount of debugging, the video link was found to be the cause. It has been removed.)

In 1992 filmmakers D.A. Pennebaker and Chris Hegedus were given unprecedented access to the inner workings of a political campaign as it unfolded toward election day. That campaign was the team of Clinton/Gore pitted against the re-election of Bush/Quayle (remember Dan Quayle?), and that election put Bill and Al in the White House for eight years.

Released in 1993, this Oscar-nominated documentary bore cinematic witness to the ’secret’ machinations of a presidential candidate’s quest for office and quickly found a worldwide audience. It was followed by distribution success that kept it on the college and independent cinema track for years. This was nothing new for Pennebaker as many of his docs have been received with similar success.

I watched it again last night for the first time since it was released fifteen years ago. Considering what’s happening on the Democratic front these days with both Hillary and Barack — the former on the verge of moving aside and the latter on the verge of ‘movin’ on up’ — this film is worth another look, for two reasons.

One, the comparison of then versus now. The ideals, talking points and issues at play are the same today as they were then. Does that mean that nothing’s changed? Does it mean that Clinton really didn’t impact Washington that much during his tenure? It’s a wonderful film to watch in present-day context, because it makes you wonder if Obama is going through the same maze of deflections, reflections and deceptions. It made me wonder if Obama really can make the difference this time. It reallymade me wonder if he and his handlers hadn’t watched this documentary and treated it as a sort of political Rosetta Stone in plotting their own course toward 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Watching the Ragin’ Cajun, James Carville, Clinton’s right-hand man during the 1992 campaign (Obama recently referred to him as nothing more than “…a performance artist…”), and George Stephanopoulos who was the campaign’s communications director, and who is now with ABC News, juggle thoughts and ideas and plot attacks on rivals is insightful and, at times, downright hilarious (don’t you just love run-on sentences?!)

The second reason is Al Gore. Although I had seen this doc before as I said, I’d forgotten how magnetic and impressive Al Gore could be. In fact, the one thing I came away with on this viewing was the speech he gave during a whistle-stop late in the campaign and mere days before the election. He captivates the crowd with his now-famous ‘up and down’ description of the economy, jobs, housing, trade, and policies both foreign and otherwise. The look on the beaming faces of Bill and Hillary Clinton as they listen on say it all - we made the right choice for running mate. The result is very reminiscent of Obama’s crowd-pleasing ‘yes we can’ Gregorian-like chant.

(* This was where the original YouTube video was placed.)

Where was THAT speech during his 2000 run at the presidency?! And who will be Obama’s choice for Veep…?

As the race for ’super-sized’ delegates continues it’s Bataan Death March (as Jon Stewart calls it), the battle lines between both presumptive pre-convention candidates, Obama and McCain, are being drawn… likely with pencils that have BIG erasers on the end!

Seems like deja vu all over again!

That’s why blogs are so important, and not just ego-massaging tools (yes, I count myself in that category… among other categories… but that’s another category!) No, they can occasionally provide endless hours of fascination whether through reading, watching or just plain staring at beautiful pictures.

This URL links to just such a site… well, a particular PAGE within the site - the rest you can wander through at your own discretion.

If you’ve ever been fascinated by Shipwrecks and Sea Disasters — the filename under which these photos can be found — then you’re in for a special treat.

The word ‘WOW’ comes to mind… several times!

The book continues, but at the moment our agent is prostituting herself presenting herself to prospective publishers at the London Book Fair. Then she’s off to New York to continue the process.

As usual, the Flickrus link in the above right will take you to the pretty pictures. More later….

Click on FLICKRUS above right for new pix.