A Change Of Venue

Note: Photo captions are time and place of WiFi connectivity.

May 19th
It’s now 5:40pm Friday May 19th and I’m 2km from the Mexican border in Nogales, Arizona… not to be confused with Nogales, Mexico which is 2km from the American border. Are we clear…? Good.

Notice I said KILOMETRES, not miles. Strangely enough, and perhaps because we’re close to the Mexican border, all road signs and mileage markers switched to KM just outside of Tucson heading south. It’s gotta drive Americans nuts!

Put simply, and in terms that are easiest to understand ’cause I’m once again fried, today was fucking awesome! Planes, planes and more planes. Then, just for fun, a trip 200 feet straight down to visit the only remaining Titan Missile silo left in existence. Tour guide was former SAC commander - knew his stuff, I tell ya. Snapped on the 10.5 and went down, so to speak. Pix later.

I’m ensconced in a Motel 6 right near the border at US$40 a night - not cheap. But FOX news and NBC are here because of the continuing border-immigrant saga, so the rates have climbed steadily since the beginning of May. Fuckin’ left wing media whores (?!) Er… RIGHT wing media whor… never mind.

Stopped by the Big 8… sorry: Super 8 thinking that would be cheap - got the 2006 books for both chains. It stated it was US$39 a night. Still not cheap, but when I pulled up they quoted US$75! Fuckin’ left wing media whor… never mind.

Anyway, going in search of WiFi to steal momentarily so I can send this.

Was considering crossing the border for some authentic ‘guest worker’ food, but there’s a… wait for it… THREE HOUR WAIT going south! It’s Friday and all, so I guess that’s an issue, together with the whole Border Patrol scenario. So, fuck that. The Latino working the desk here at Chateau 6 suggested a family-run enchilada house (one that serves it, not made of it, one assumes) nearby. Fabulous Thai food in a strip mall near Davis-Monthan Air Base last night. Real Thai basil, galanga, lemon grass, and everything else. Amazing - best Thai food I’ve had in years, in fact.

Got on the airbase itself today to tour the facility known as AMARC [Aerospace Maintenance And Regeneration Center]. Suffice to say this is the airplane ‘bone yard’ y’all have read about. Over 3000 planes of all eras, most post WWII, but including everything from a replica of the Wright Brothers’ plane from Kitty Hawk (which they trot out every year on the anniversary and actually fly!) to a Sopwith Camel to several B52s and even a dozen or so B1 bombers. These are all flyable, by the way. They’re not put out to pasture. They’re just there as the world’s biggest junk yard of parts. But in fact each is coded based on how many days it would take to make them air worthy. Most can be made ‘flyable’ within seven days. Amazing when you look at the state of some of them. Apparently, 20% of the planes used in the first Gulf War came from this boneyard.

They have not one but TWO former presidential Air Force One planes - the last prop version and the first 707 jet version. The former was used by both Kennedy and Johnson. And you can walk through it. Plus an SR-71 that you can actually walk up to and touch. Since the summer’s fast approaching, no one comes here much. I had the ENTIRE fucking outdoor museum to myself for about a half an hour. After that, three old geezers joined me. One of them — didn’t want to give me his name (?) — flew bombing runs over Vietnam in one of the B52s on display. He knew it was his, because he checked the tail number. He intimated that this one flew out of the Philippines to drop ‘illegal’ payloads on Laos and Cambodia for the CIA.

Speaking of which, two of the most interesting planes — one we drove right in front of, the other we couldn’t get close to — were two “Looking Glass” black-ops C130s. These were the planes that were loaded to the gunwhales with eavesdropping, jamming and communications equipment. During the cold war, at least one of these was in the air 24/7. Their only purpose was to insure that the Soviet Union was destroyed in the event of an all-out nuclear exchange. The theory being that if MAD (Mutually Assured Destruction - not the first time this lovely acronym was brought up today!) were to be initiated, CIA’s “Looking Glass” war would, and could, control all remaining launch codes from the air. The plane itself bore no markings whatsoever. It was painted pure white.

The other plane (of which there were thirty or so on base - the guide wasn’t certain how many exactly) was a C120, the baby sister of the C130 troop carrier. This plane differed from it’s bigger sister in two ways. One, it had two engines instead of four (it was designed to travel great distances at low altitudes, with low noise). And two, its payload.

The C130 was the primary troop carrier during the Vietnam War. The C120 was the ONLY carrier of the defoliant 2,4,5-T - Agent Orange. According to our guide, he isn’t supposed to talk about it, but he’s a Democrat and on disability so he doesn’t care. All the C120s on base are not only in a separate part of the facility, but is a sealed, custom-made hangar awaiting, as he referred to it, cradle-to-grave incarceration. He says that these planes are the most ‘infected’ planes in the world. They can’t be cut up and sold for junk or scrap, they can’t be sold privately, they can’t be burned, the EPA would raise holy hell should they attempt that. So, he says, they sit in their man-made above-ground tomb awaiting a presidential directive to have them shipped into the desert and buried under hundreds of tons of sand and concrete.

They even have the Lockheed Constellation that Eisenhower used prior to commissioning the concept of a proper Presidential plane. And one of two of Amelia Earhart’s Lockheed’s. The other one’s whereabouts, only Amelia knows. And maybe a few Japanese!

Truly unbelievable site. Makes the Abbotsford Airshow look very provincial. What makes the whole experience so fascinating is that the site is part of a working Air Force base. Consequently, you’re walking around taking in all these static displays of winged armament while A10 attack planes in formation, and C130s are buzzing over head. Wild!

Off to dinner, then maybe pictures, WiFi willing!

Tomorrow, Tombstone and beyond to New Mexico.

Reporting tonight from the Mexican border in Nogales, Arizona

P.S. Aha! WiFi - weak, but good enough. Bwa ha ha! Just noticed… out behind this Mexican place I just ate at is the HQ for Border Patrol. Guess whose WiFi I’m stealing…?! Bwa ha ha! (Deep breath) BWA HA HA!!!!